Letter Re: Finding God’s will re. new position
Sigh… I’m in need of some advice. I hope you can help me out! And I don’t have much time to think about it – I have to decide by tomorrow.
Yesterday I was offered a really fantastic job. It’s a huge pay rise from what I’m on now and they’d also pay for me to do a course. I haven’t even sought this job out – they’ve called me up about it. They think I’d be perfect. It’s the sort of job that some people would kill to have so to be offered it without even trying is amazing. So it’s really a fantastic career move.
The problem is, I don’t want to have the kind of job they are offering. I would have to “live and breathe” their business. It’s also really long hours – 9am to 7pm Mon to Friday. The course would probably be one evening a week for a year.
My heart is not in it at all. In fact the job would be going in the exact opposite direction to where I want to go.
I’m not 100 per cent sure what it is I DO want… But of course you can’t always have what you want!
At my age, what’s the most sensible thing to do? Follow my heart or my head? Should I be brave enough to do it, just to have it on my CV and learn a lot? Or should I be brave enough to turn it down in the hope I can find something better? I don’t really want to keep on with what I’m doing at the moment either. My boss is causing much stress and I really do want a change of.
I’ve heard of lots of stories of people who are ‘older’ who look back and regret having taken what seemed the good option only to get stuck in a career they don’t enjoy. I don’t want that to happen, but if I turn the job down would it be a terrible mistake?
I’ve prayed about it but God hasn’t dropped an answer out of the sky, so to speak. And it’s not as though either choice would be going against his will, if you know what I mean.
It’s a lot to ask, I know, but I’m really confused.
Thanks for sharing your heart with us. Your email has just come in and so I’ll share right off the cuff my gut level response to your situation.
Some principle factors to consider in your decision-making:
- Faith – trust in God to provide the right job at the right time; also trust in Him to guide you step by step together with James through the process. When we are offered a new position, our first step should be to go to submit the whole issue to God – a sign that we are living under His Lordship and want Him to determine whether we should go for it or not. In other words, to say to God: “Father, all I want is what YOU desire for me. I don’t want to covet this job and the big bucks I would receive. All I want is to be Your servant wherever You want me to be. I take my hands off this job, and let you guide me/us through the decision-making process – for Your name’s sake.” You shouldn’t take it for granted that such a good job even with the huge salary increase is God’s will for you. In fact, it could be in fact just the opposite – a point of temptation. I’m hoping the principles I’m sharing with you will help you understand and discern whether this is from God or merely from man. Be careful to trust in God to guide you through your thoughts AND your heart (your inner spirit) – not just your head/intellect. Sometimes what appears to our human thinking to be just the “ideal” job (cf. just the ideal future mate) is God putting our trust to the test to see if we are truly willing to wait for His better plan to be made clear to us.
- Family – you are not just a career person but now as a wife, this fact must be given a HIGH priority in your life regardless of what the world tells (and preaches to) you. You must consider the impact of such a new job upon your marriage. Absolutely fundamental.
- God’s priorities – I do not believe money and salary should be the determining factors in such a decision. They are not God’s priorities. And what’s the point of living for something that you don’t even feel at all interested in doing just to get more money? Are you strapped for money right now? I would imagine that you are both able to pay your bills without too much difficulty. Rather job satisfaction, enjoyment of what you’re doing gives you (and your husband JJ!!) and much greater quality of life. What’s more, the hours in that job offer would really bring you home late and very tired. Again competing with relationship factors in your marriage – i.e. one of God’s HIGH priorities for you, Elly.
- God’s peace – that which is from God is always accompanied with His peace deep in our hearts. It’s quite a subjective matter, yet it’s also terribly important. One thing over the years, Elly, that has often guided us both in making such decisions is to realise that God is never the author of confusion. He fills our hearts and minds with clarity and peace when He is in the matter we are considering. It’s rather clear from your email that you don’t have that peace about this offer.
- Time – personally there is always a question mark in our minds concerning a matter when we are more or less forced to make a hasty decision. God is never in a big hurry though we usually need to make a decision within a certain time space. However, though God works within our time frame, we must also say that God’s “timing” is very different to ours. He will not delay in showing you which new job He wants you to take. But that will require patience to wait on your part. So don’t be afraid to say “no” in the meantime to other offers until He gives you that definite “YES” in your spirit, and the other indicators as mentioned above are all coming together.
There are just a few quick, off the cuff comments for your prayerful reflection, Elly.
Be assured of our prayers.
With our love,